How to Get What You Want in Life – A Quick Plan For Your Future

how to get what you want in life - couple on yacht enjoying the day
how to get what you want in life - couple on yacht enjoying the day

You want to transform your life…

You really want it. So much in fact, that you can’t stop thinking about it.

Yet, the more you think about what you want in life, the harder it seems to get hold of it.

What is it that you really want?

Deciding what you want sounds simple, but it isn’t.

Many people are overly busy and completely unfulfilled because they have not clearly mapped out what they want. They have been running on a treadmill going nowhere – fast.

Have you been:

  • ursuing jobs that you think could be the right fit?
  • Seeking relationships that you have not clearly figured out?
  • Going with the flow, allowing the breeze to take you where it wishes, following the herd?
  • Clear on what it is you want?

You cannot succeed in life if you go through daily motions, tackling unimportant tasks. If you do not identify specific goals that you want to achieve, you will end up going in circles. In the process, you will become uninspired, physically tired, spiritually drained, and far from where you should be.

Determining what you want in life takes a lot of contemplation and deep reflection. You will never get what you want until you can see your future with great clarity. It is a lot easier to get what you want when you know what it is.

How to get what you want?

Research indicates that the main reason why people are not where they want to be is that the human mind gives excuses, and many people accept them.

Once you have decided what you want, you must prioritize your goals and tasks over everything that can get in the way of your dreams.

Many people get fired up when they draw up their goals, but the fires are gone shortly after. Therefore, you must find what drives you to achieve your dreams. What do you want? Financial freedom? To live life on your terms? To not have anyone control your schedule? Use this as motivation to pursue what you want.

The brain is a goal-seeking organ. What you assign your unconscious mind, it will work day and night to achieve.

Focus on what you want

Pay attention to how you think about what you want. You must train your mind to think thoughts that are useful to your goal. Experts indicate that the human brain has over 70,000 thoughts every single day. However, many of these thoughts are negative, and they contribute significantly to sabotaging your success.

If you focus on being poor and never finding love, these are the thoughts that will dominate your mind. If you focus on happiness, success, and abundance, you will create mental pictures of things improving in your life. This will energize you and create the right environment for you to succeed in your actions.

The unconscious mind will allow you to have only what you believe you deserve. If you have a small view of yourself then what you deserve is poverty. And your unconscious will see to it that you get that actually….

Dr. David Hawkins

Believe you can get what you want

Before you can create anything in your life, you must first create it in your mind.

Scientists indicate that you respond to what your brain, based on your previous experiences, expects to happen next. Your mind is such a powerful instrument that can deliver literally everything that you want. However, you must believe that what you want is possible.

Possessing unwavering belief that you can achieve anything you want is an essential component of fulfilling your desires. Your conviction that you are destined to achieve something is a major determining factor in your ability to attain it.

How many times do you say, ‘I hope I can, and I might’ as opposed to, ‘I know I can, and, I will!’

You will find that many times, you doubt yourself. You live in a state of constant fear and anxiety, wondering if you will ever be good enough to fulfill your goals.

Instead of predicting what could go wrong and why you cannot do it, be your own gatekeeper. Trust yourself; have confidence and believe that you are connected to your higher power.

Invest in yourself

Part of attaining what you want is investing in yourself: developing rare and valuable skills.

When you invest in yourself, you will do incredible things. You must develop a craftsman’s mentality:  high quality skills and true mastery of what you do. When you develop valuable skills, it is then that you get yourself in a rare position to chart your own path.

So, start putting your efforts where your mouth is. A lot of time, money, and attention goes into developing mastery. Read books, take courses, pay for live mentoring. Eventually, you will effortlessly be able to work towards what you want.

Create an action plan

Achieving your goals requires you to take massive action on a consistent basis. Without a solid action plan, it becomes challenging to keep taking action on a daily basis and push through all the limitations that hold you back.

Think of an airplane, for instance. While the airplane has a goal: it knows where it is going, it must also have an action plan to get there. This is the flight plan. Without a flight plan, how would a pilot know how to get the airplane from point A to point B?

Create small milestones

The main reason why people give up on the pursuit of their goals is being too focused on the end game. For instance, setting out to create $20K of passive income a month and quit your job in the next four months may not be realistic if you are starting out.

If this is your only goal, you are likely to get frustrated quickly and give up. Why? Because, even if you are making progress, it is difficult to feel like you are since you don’t have milestones. Instead of focusing on one big lofty goal, create several little milestones so that four months from now, instead of seeing one unchecked box, you will have several checked ones.


Successful people do what unsuccessful people don’t want to do. Remind yourself this every day especially when you find yourself making excuses to not act on achieving your dreams and goals.

Execution also means that you have the discipline to forgo instant pleasure. It is easier to succumb to that one chocolate bar, it is tempting to press the snooze button instead of going for a jog; it will feel good to buy that gorgeous pair of shoes instead of saving the money – but only for an instant.

Deep down you know what is right. You must find your inner ability to get over yourself and your feelings and execute. When your drive to push through is intact, you will overcome every excuse; even the reason of not having enough time.

Magic is something you make

The possibilities of your life are endless. It is easy to carry the belief that your life is already mapped out of you. It is also easy to listen when other people tell you what you can and cannot do. The concept of gratefulness has been misused: the society wants you to settle for what you have and be grateful for it.

The truth, however, is that you should define what success means to you and go after it. You should not conform to the status quo. Think about what you want, not about what society wants you to have. There is only one you on this plant. Take advantage of that.

Establish what you want and go for it

There is only one person who is responsible for the quality of life you live, and that person is you.

You are responsible for your own happiness. The life you live is a result of your doing or not doing. If you want to achieve your dreams, you must take responsibility for the thoughts you think, the images you visualize and the actions you take.

Do not waste time and energy complaining and blaming. It is about you. Take 100% responsibility of achieving what you want.

4 Famous Mottos & Why Everyone Needs a Motto to Live By

Mottos to live by - a coat of arms


Long ones and short ones. Witty ones and dull ones.

Some are grammatically correct while some break all the rules of language. Some have been around for many years while others hardly see the light of day.

Why are mottos so important?

A motto helps to set the organization apart from its competitors. It represents the set of beliefs that best describe the organization and outlines the image that it wishes to project to the public. A good motto fuses business promises with customers’ perceptions. It communicates the organization’s unique benefits.

The aim of developing a motto is reinforcing the identity and reputation of a brand. Every organization wants to be perceived positively by customers: innovative, trustworthy, committed to service, and transformative.

Here is:

  • who we are
  • how we are different
  • what you will get from us

This is what a motto is.

The stories behind famous institutions’ and sports clubs’ mottos.

When mottos are carefully crafted, they convey a brand’s essential characteristics. A useful motto is tattooed on the prime real estate of the customer’s subconscious. It activates preference for your brand when the consumers are ready to buy.

motto to live by - FC Barcelona's motto

F.C Barcelona: ‘Mes que un club’.  More than a club.

Founded as Football Club Barcelona in 1899, the club is a symbol of Catalonian culture and Catalanism.

The motto represents the pride of being a Catalan in a country that was ruled by a Fascist who tried to eliminate the culture for years. During the Franco regime, FC Barcelona became an essential symbol of the Catalan pride and identity.

The motto ‘More than a club’ therefore expresses the significance of the club beyond sports. It is one of the greatest ambassadors of the Catalonian culture.

The club is seen by many people as a symbol for people’s democratic rights and freedom. The expression has been used over the years to describe other attributes of the Club’s uniqueness:

  • The club’s dedication to social causes
  • The fact that the club competes in several different sports outside of football
  • The club as a vehicle for many charity programs: ACNUR, UNICEF, and UNESCO.
  • The club as a global icon


The FC Barcelona is the second largest sports club in the world.

nike factory store - just do it - motto to live by

NIKE: ‘Just do it’

‘Just Do it’ came from an unlikely source.

In 1988, Gary Gilmore was a Portland native criminal. At one point, he murdered a man and a woman in Utah. He was sent to jail and was sentenced to death. When he was brought before the firing squad, he was asked whether he had any final thoughts. His reply was, ‘Let’s just do it’.

Dan Wieden, the co-founder of Wieden & Kennedy; the agency in charge of Nike’s advertising campaign, thought the statement was a fitting motto. He did not like ‘Let’s just do it’, so he changed it to ‘Just do it’.

The motto quickly spread throughout the world and became an inspirational message for all areas of life: entertainment, sports, tolerance, health, and fitness. ‘Just do it’ has been described as the best motto of the 20th century by Campaign Magazine.

Facts about Nike:

The word ‘Nike’ is taken from an Ancient Greek mythology. ‘Nike’ was a goddess who symbolized victory.

According to the myth, the goddess influenced countless brave warriors. The brand ‘Nike’ is therefore associated with the mythological attributes of the goddess: victory, flight, speed, power, and motivation

Motto to live by - Apple

Apple: Think Different

‘Think different’ was created in 1997. Steve Jobs, co-founder Apple Computer, returned to the company to become the interim Chief Executive Officer. The company was in a crisis. Its market share had plummeted from 14 percent to below 3%.

Jobs was determined to address the problems at the company. He contacted Chit / Day advertising agency to come up with an advertising campaign. They wanted to create something revolutionary, different and unprecedented. After long hours of brainstorming, they came up with the idea of ‘Think different’.

The campaign kicked off with the motto accompanied by black and white images of visionary thinkers of all time:

  • Albert Einstein,
  • Martin Luther King. Jr
  • Bob Dylan
  • Thomas Edison
  • John Lennon
  • Richard Branson
  • R. Buckminster Fuller
  • Ted Turner
  • Mohammed Ali
  • Mahatma Gandhi
  • Alfred Hitchcock
  • Amelia Earhart
  • Frank Lloyd Wright
  • Pablo Picasso
  • Martha Graham
  • Jim Henson
  • Maria Callas

Over the years, more personalities have been used on the posters.

The motto seeks to pass the message that creative people with a passion can change the world for the better. It celebrates the soul of the Apple brand.

Facts about Apple:

  • Apple earns $300,000 per minute.
  • Apple is worth $118.9 Billion. It is the most valuable brand in the world.
  • Smoking near Apple computers voids the warranty.

McDonald’s: “I’m lovin’ it.”

In 2003, McDonald’s posted its first ever loss. The chain hired Larry Light to revamp its marketing.

Larry hired Heye & Partner, an agency from a small town in Germany. The agency settled on the jingle ‘I’m lovin’ it’, and Justin Timberlake was paid $6 million to sing it.

The Campaign appeared in 120 countries; in more than 20 languages. ‘I’m lovin’ it’ appeals to people of all age and nationalities. It endears people to the brand.

Facts about McDonald’s:

  • McDonald’s opens a new restaurant every 14.5 hours
  • The queen of England owns a McDonald’s near Buckingham Palace

In short…

As you can see, there are real stories behind all the incredible mottos that are around us. Also, the phrases may be short, but that does not in any way reflect the amount of work and time that goes into their creation.

It takes a lot of creativity and effort to come up with an effective motto. We hope these stories will inspire you to create an incredible motto for yourself or your business when the time comes.

11 Powerful Affirmations for Women Taken From Some of History’s Greatest Women

Affirmations for women - Woman succeeding and celebrating

Affirmations for women - Woman succeeding and celebrating

THE WORLD HAS BEEN GRACED BY many hugely successful women from a wide variety of industries: Science, politics, fashion, education, entertainment, sports…name it. Throughout the centuries, women have defied many odds and blazed trails, shattered glass ceilings and broken records.

Common qualities

One quality that these successful women have in common is their ability to rise above difficult and negative situations. They do not complain and they do not lament. They are optimistic; always looking on the positive side of things.

These successful women go one step further; they have learnt to create their own world. They do not accept what is handed to them. They harness their thoughts and create the world that they desire.

My life did not please me. So, I created my life. – Coco Chanel

The rest of us look at these successful women: Oprah Winfrey, Hillary Clinton, Sonia Gandhi, Christiane Amanpour, Cristina Fernandez, Aung San Suui Kyi, Mary McAleese, Mia Farrow, Barbara Walters, J.K Rowling among many others and  admire them. We also wonder how they excelled despite incredible hardships.

It is important to remember that we all have magic inside us. – J. K. Rowling

What can hinder success

However, women must believe in their ability to succeed. For the longest time, many have listened to the negative voices that have said we are less visionary, less dependable and less competitive. What is more, we have internalized these messages:

  • Many of women feel like they don’t do enough or matter enough.
  • Women are less likely than men to jump at opportunities for professional advancement
  • Women perceive professional power as less desirable than men do.
  • Research shows that even though women have more overall life goals as compared to men, they are less likely to strive for powerful jobs and are more likely to anticipate adverse outcomes from a potential promotion.
  • Women don’t give themselves the credit they deserve. When women communicate their achievements, it is seen as bragging. Women have learned to dull their shine since they have lost confidence to sell themselves.

We need to replace the negative voices with positive affirmations. Affirmations can rewrite our brains and improve our energy.

Affirmations for women - woman thinking about her work

Life stems from your thoughts

We have to be careful with our thoughts and words. As women, we should only think those thoughts which work towards our benefit and cultivate our highest good. Affirmation will purify our thoughts and restructure the dynamic of our brains so that we manifest our worth and attract what we deserve.

11 affirmations for women adapted from famous and powerful women

Many women have defied the odds and done exceptionally well in their various field. These women are incredible role models to many of us who feel as if we come into the world with the odds already stack against us. We hope these affirmations from inspirational women will inspire you to pursue your dreams.


Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stone to greatness. – Oprah Winfrey (Business Mogul/Philanthropist)


When one door of happiness closes, another opens. But often, we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which been opened for us. – Hellen Keller (Author/ political activist)


Do one thing every day that scares you. – Eleanor Roosevelt (First lady of the US)


Don’t be intimated by what you do not know. That can be your greatest strength. – Sarah Blakely (founder of spanx/ World’s youngest female billionaire)


I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles. – Audrey Hepburn (Actress)


I always did something I was a little not ready to do. I think that’s how you grow. When there’s that moment of ‘wow,’ I’m not sure I can do this, and you push through these moments; that’s when you have the break through. – Marissa Meyer (CEO of Yahoo)


Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love. – Mother Theresa (philanthropist/charity worker)


The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. – Ayn Rand (Novelist/philosopher)


I am fearless; I don’t complain. Even when horrible things happen to me, I go on. – Sofia Vergara (Entrepreneur/actress)


Whatever you want in life, other people are going to want it too. Believe in yourself enough to accept the idea that you have an equal right to it. – Diane Sawyer (ABC/ World news / Disney)


I learned always to take on things I had never done before. Growth and comfort do not co-exist.  – Virginia Rometty (CEO of IBM)

Now it’s your turn…

If these women excelled, you too can. Look at their attitudes! Look at their beliefs! None of them said ‘I can’t! Whatever you say, the universe will endow you with the abilities to do just that.

Click here if you are looking for more affirmation information.

How to Change Your Life in 7 Days – A 7 Day Success Habit Setting Guide

A New Day a New Start in Your Life - How to Change Your Life in 7 Days

A New Day a New Start in Your Life - How to Change Your Life in 7 Days

CAN  YOU CHANGE YOUR life in seven days? Absolutely! Many of us can point a time when our lives changed instantly.

Maybe we had a child or a new addition to the family, moved into a new home, started a new job, bought a new car or we made a monumental decision that transformed our lives.

How Much of A Difference Can You Make?

You see, the changes that impact our lives the most are changes in the way we see the world. Not changes in the world itself. And we can change the way we perceive the world in an instant.

Sometimes even a small change can make a massive difference. The world leading hypnotist Paul McKenna gives the following illustration:

“Imagine you and a friend are walking along two parallel, straight roads, stretching side by side into the infinite distance. Now, imagine that at some point the roads shift from each other just a tiny bit. At first, the difference is not even noticeable. However, over time, that small change in direction will take the two of you to completely different destinations.”

If you commit to making tiny changes every day, over a period, you will be surprised at how far you have come and just how much you have changed. When you dedicate yourself to small actions, they will set a wave of change in many areas of your life.

An oil tanker takes a little while to start moving, but it becomes difficult to stop once it builds up sufficient momentum.

Allow me to give you one more illustration.

For many centuries, it was believed that it was not possible to run a four-minute mile. In fact, some scientists had indicated that the human body would explode if it were subjected to a four-minute mile!

On 6th of March 1954, Roger Bannister did the impossible. He ran the four-minute mile! All of a sudden, what had been thought impossible for centuries was now possible:

  • The following year, thirty seven people ran the four-minute mile.
  • The year after that, an incredible 300 athletes hit the once impossible four-minute mile.

Whatever the human mind believes, it generalizes as a principle. You can reprogram your mind to make you a happier, more confident and productive person.

What Do You Want to Change?

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. Mike Murdock.

There are many aspects of our lives that we may not like: Some of us are overweight while others are broke, many are unhappy and would love nothing more than to meet their soulmate. Some of us could be feeling stuck in unfulfilling relationships; jobs that we no longer enjoy; positions that no longer inspire us.

Many of us would love to change our lives: lose weight, move cities, travel the world, go back to school, fall in love, stop procrastination, get a promotion, write a book. Save money……

What are the changes you would want to see in your life?

The Powerful Strategy of New Habits

You can bring all the changes you want in your life by incorporating new habits. A study by Duke University revealed that habits form about 45 percent of our total behavior. Habits are the foundation of our lives, and if the foundation is weak, we will never be happy. The reason we fail often times is because we try to do too much at once.

How to Change Your Life in Seven Days

If we want to make massive changes in any area of our lives, we should start by choosing the change that we desire. Then, we must shrink this change into small habits. After that, we only need to start and watch good things happening in our lives.

Here is a sample plan of how you can change your life in seven days

Monday: Positive thinking

What consumes your mind controls your life.

Life could be so much better for many of us if only we would replace our negative thoughts with positive ones:

  • I am a miserable failure
  • Why do these things always happen to me?
  • I can never do anything right: why can’t I be like X?
  • I don’t think I can do this.
  • Will I ever be successful?

When we think positively, we experience a pleasant feeling. When we are happy we feel more powerful, and the universe responds by bringing pleasant and powerful things our way.


  • Commit to two positive thoughts every day.
  • Name three things you are thankful for every day.

Tuesday: Fitness

Work out, for a healthy body holds a healthy mind.

According to CDC, regular physical exercise boosts our thinking, learning and judgment skills. Indeed, exercise will help preserve these skills as we age. It will also reduce the risk of depression.


  • Commit to walking 10 minutes every day.
  • Do ten jumping jacks every day.

Wednesday: Self-growth

The greatest solution to all human problems is individual inner transformation.              Vernon Howard

We are at an exciting time in history with a world that is transforming every day. Things that were unthinkable 50 years ago are now a reality. To keep up with this profoundly transformative life, we must also seek to grow and keep improving ourselves. Transformation must not only happen in our environments but also in our inner resources. Personal development is crucial to your success.


  • Commit to meditating for ten minutes every day.
  • Read two pages of an inspiring book every day.

Thursday: Financial growth

Whoever said money could not buy happiness simply did not know where to go shopping. – Bo Derek

We all want financial independence, and this an excellent desire. Money gives us choices and personal power. It helps us to attract new opportunities in our lives. When we have money, we can survive more, share more of ourselves and inspire more.


  • Start cooking and eating at home
  • Take the train to work instead of driving
  • Commit to starting a side hustle

Friday: Stop procrastinating

Procrastination is hands down our favorite form of self-sabotage.  – Alyce P. Corryn

Procrastination is very literally the opposite of productivity. We are always tempted to put off things that are involving, unpleasant, difficult or painful. Unfortunately, essential tasks will always be characterized by one or more of the above attributes. Procrastination can literally cripple our lives.


  • Set the most import task each morning and work on it for 20 minutes.

Saturday: Find your soul mate

The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves or rather, loved in spite of ourselves. – Victor Hugo

There is nothing as electrifying as falling in love. Romantic relationships enrich our lives with friendships, courtship and love. We can confide in our romantic partners and share our problems with them. We can be comforted and receive and give unconditional friendship. How fulfilling it is to be part of something that is bigger than ourselves!


  • Go somewhere each day and meet new people.
  • Do something daily that will make you a fascinating person.

Sunday: Diet

Take care of your body. It is the only place you have to live in.

According to CDC, carrying around too much weight is not only uncomfortable and but also damaging to our health. Being fit is also beyond being a certain size or looking great in a particular type of clothing. Research shows that there is a positive correlation between your health and mental success. Being physically fit ensures you have more energy to pursue your goals.

Also, the healthier you are, the more gracefully you age.


  • Eat two healthy meals per day.
  • Switch from drinking soda to drinking water
  • Drink two glasses of water when you wake up and a glass every time you take a break.

Give Yourself A Pat on the Back

You can change nearly any area of your life, one habit at a time. Incorporating small habits and routines will significantly enhance your life.

Every habit is like a seed; the small daily acts plant positive suggestions in your mind that will eventually grow into powerful new ways of living. Dedicate this week to transforming your life, one little habit at a time.

What new daily habits will you start today?

A year from now you will wish you had started today. Karen Lamb  

Thanks for reading this guide on ‘how to change your life in 7 days’. If you’d like to make a comment, or you have a query or question then you can do so here.


How to Write a Letter of Affirmation: The Only Love Letter You’ll Ever Need

Woman writing a letter of affirmation whilst riding on a train

Woman writing a letter of affirmation whilst riding on a train

THINK ABOUT IT: so much of what we see and hear about ourselves and our lives comes from other people – and this starts from an early age.

During your schooling years, you would have been sent home with a report card at the end of each term detailing exactly what you could and couldn’t do in each subject. And even if you graduated a long time ago and are currently working – you may feel like nothing’s really changed. The only thing is, it’s your employer assessing your performance – not your teacher!

Then there are TV ads and Instagram posts showing off models driving top-of-the-line cars, and wearing nothing but designer threads (or just nothing!).

What does this mean? It means that consciously and subconsciously it is very easy to absorb the message that you are not good enough. That what you have is not good enough. Don’t get me wrong it’s perfectly OK to dream of having more of something (or less!) – but these dreams need to be your own.

They need to be born in YOUR mind, not from someone else’s Instagram account. You should never feel less than because someone else has a bigger house than yours. In fact, you should never feel less than FULL STOP.

How do you gain some distance from ALL the opinions? And how do you realize your self-worth when the world seems so eager to bring you down at every turn?

Two words: affirmation letter.

Woman writing a letter of affirmation at sunset

What Exactly is a Letter of Affirmation?

An affirmation letter is essentially a detailed love letter to yourself.

The idea is to write down what you like about yourself, things that you are good at, and your personal goals and dreams – and then, of course, read it! It helps you to:

  • Focus on all the things that are good about you
  • Drown out other people’s negative voices (and your inner negative voice too!)
  • Improve your self-esteem
  • Build your self-confidence
  • Encourage positive thinking
  • Clearly define your goals and dreams
  • Focus on your positive traits
  • Look at the brighter side of life

Once you’ve written your letter, you should re-read it any time you are experiencing hardship, or feel overwhelmed. And to heighten the experience, you can record yourself reading your letter and play it back three or four times a week. In this way, you are hearing positive things about yourself AS WELL as reading them.

How to write a letter of affirmation – a 5-step guide.

  1. Start by addressing the letter to yourself. If your name is Mary, you should literally write ‘Dear Mary’.
  2. In the first paragraph list the things you like and admire about yourself. Maybe you have a quirky dress sense that you pride yourself on. Or maybe you helped a co-worker out with their workload the other day. Perhaps you gave a homeless person some money? Or you have a great sense of humor? It doesn’t matter what it is, if it makes you feel good about who you are as a person, write it down.
  3. Outline any current challenges in your life right now. Are you unhappy in your relationship? Do you wish to lose or gain weight? Or is the stress of job hunting getting you down? The key here is to state any challenges in a confident tone that implies you WILL overcome them.
  4. State any specific plans you have to overcome your current challenges. The point of this paragraph is to determine your immediate next steps. But if you haven’t made any specific plans yet, you can still list the traits and attributes that will help you overcome your obstacles.
  5. Outline your long-term dreams and goals. But instead of saying “My aim is to retire by the time I’m 40 and live in Mexico,” say it like there is no doubt in your mind that you WILL achieve it: “By the age of 41 I will be retired and living in a little hut in Tulum, Mexico.”
  6. Conclude your letter with what you want your lasting legacy to be. What do you want to be remembered for? Say it in such a way that it WILL happen: “I will be remembered for my infectious laugh, sense of humor, and kindness.”

Example of a Letter of Affirmation

If you don’t really like writing, or have writer’s block, the example below can help you. Though this is a specific example, certain phrases in the letter can be directly copied and pasted into yours, or you can simply use this letter as a loose guide to help you structure yours.


Dear Mary,

You know what I love about you? I love the way you really listen. You always give people space to tell you their story – and you never interrupt. Around you, people feel heard and cared for. The other day you helped a mum get her baby and pram onto the train before it took off – you are so incredibly kind and compassionate.

Mary, right now you’re experiencing some issues at work. You feel undervalued and overworked. You’ve tried talking to your superiors, but they have not been as accommodating as you would have liked – and this has created a negative dynamic at work.

You’re going through a difficult time and don’t know what to do. Will you stay in this workplace until your retirement, which is only eight years away? And try to focus on the very few good aspects of your job? Or should you invest significant time and energy into finding a new job for yourself?

It’s a difficult decision. But you need to know something: you are the most organized person EVER, you’re an extremely hard worker, you are a damn good person – and any employer would be lucky to have you. You ARE worthy of a better job – there’s no doubt about it. But if you were to stay in your current one, that would be OK too. Staying is NOT a sign of failure. In fact, whether you stay or go: it’s a sign of strength. Because neither of your two options is easy. Either way: you will survive. You will find happiness again, and you will find a way to enjoy these last 8 years of employment. Because that’s just who you are: a person who gets it done.

You know what the best part is? No matter if you stay in this job or find a new one, you WILL reach your goal of saving enough for your retirement and you WILL remain known as a strong, brave, and caring woman. So go easy on yourself with this decision – it may seem like it’s the be all and end all – but no matter what you choose, you will be OK. Because I believe in you.

Love you always,


The Take Home Message

It truly doesn’t matter how long or short the letter is, how well you’ve written it (you do not need to be a professional writer!), or how insignificant you think your problems are (spoiler alert: if something is making you unhappy, it’s not insignificant). It simply matters that you:

The rest is up to you. This is probably the first time you’ll be telling yourself how amazing you are. Maybe it’s even the fist time you’ll ‘speak’ nicely to yourself – so have fun with it. You deserve this! And more importantly, you need it. Good luck.